It’s all Systematic
Seeing Relationships, Part 3
At the end of 2023, I wrote two essays on seeing in terms of relationships. In them, I talked about the value of diversity and the importance of expanding our notion of kinship, since every species is an integral part of the whole and should be valued as such. In this essay, which is really part 3 on relationships, I’ll delve into interdependence and how everything and everyone is intertwined; a part of systems within systems.
Interdependence
It’s simply not possible to be completely independent. We are not discrete, individual entities. Everything is permeable.There is no clear edge where something begins or ends. Every being needs food and shelter and water and air and a little luck to survive. Everyone is influenced by their experiences, by the sun and the wind and the tides; by the change of seasons, and the tug of the moon. While there is always the freedom to make choices in any given situation, there is little control over what happens as a result. Everyone is enmeshed with the world, and actions have impacts and consequences.
To see clearly, one must recognize this interdependence with humility. This means seeing the intrinsic worth and purpose of everything, including ourselves. Humility is having love, respect, service, and compassion for all beings. It’s the essence of letting things and people be as they are and were meant to be. Through humility, all of life is seen as it is, a gift.
Once one begins to see in terms of relationships rather than discrete objects, and recognizes the interdependent nature of life, everything can be seen as part of systems of exchange - whether in an ecosystem, a business organization, a community, or a family. Everything is part of a constant and evolving web of relationships which are necessary for survival.
Let’s take a look at the science of these systems, through the lens of Margaret Wheatley’s fascinating book, Leadership and the New Science.
What is a system?
A system is a whole that is greater than the sum of its parts. According to scientist Dan Siegel (Mind), a complex, open system is made up of elements which are constantly interacting with the world. You can study the behavior of a system by looking at the interactions between the parts. These elements adapt to outside influences, and can be random in their unfolding.
The world often seems chaotic and this is by design. What seems chaotic in a system is actually an inevitable part of this process of change. Small inputs from outside can lead to unpredictable results. Wheatley says that open systems do not seek to stay the same. Instead, they partner with their environment and evolve, but not in a linear way. They notice disruptions, which are signals of change, and take in new energy and information, while eliminating what’s no longer relevant. This is called self-organization; the way the system regulates its own growth and development.
“Disequilibrium can not only lead to growth, it’s necessary for growth.” ~ Wheatley
Wheatley explains how clouds are a perfect example of this process. They’re constantly moving and changing according to evolving interactions with air and water. The key to growth in a system is whether new information is free to circulate. This isn’t passively reacting to outside influence; rather, the system actively seeks new information and responds and reorganizes accordingly. It’s a collaborative process.
An ecosystem is made up of interactions that have evolved over millions of years. When these interactions are not damaged, the ecosystem stays healthy and balanced. Each element of the system gives what it can for the benefit of all. No element of the system takes more than it needs. This is reciprocity at work. By ensuring that everyone thrives, the ecosystem ensures its survival.
However, if one element takes more than it needs, the system can get out of balance and respond with distress. One could argue that the reciprocity between humans and non-humans is currently out of balance and we’re seeing the effects. Disruptions require adaptation.
You are a System
You too are constantly changing and adapting every day. While it might feel as if you wake up each morning the same person and in the same world as the night before, that’s simply not true. Each of us is changing as a result of our interactions in the world. We adapt and grow as we go, just like all systems.
If you look back on your own life, you may see similar patterns of chaos and self-organization. My parents’ divorce when I was 16 was a particularly chaotic time, yet the circumstances around it suddenly forced me to become more independent and self-sufficient. I had to self-organize to this new reality. Most new growth comes in surprising and unexpected ways, often through some sort of change, not always wanted.
When one becomes too rigid in their views, or in where they get their information, the system breaks down. They’re not able to see clearly because they’re stuck in an information funnel. Social media algorithms do this to us all the time. I believe that everyone would benefit from noticing how much they interpret and evaluate based on narrowed lenses. How do you deal with new information as it arises? Do you seek out new information?
Wheatley suggests noticing the interactions between things. See how everything affects everything else in some way. Look at the whole, not just the parts, and how things work together. She says to work with, not against, the forces of change.
Life is resilient and unstoppable, like a river. Live in the space of unknowing for a while. We can open ourselves up by seeking out opposing views, seeing the complexity in situations, and entertaining new possibilities.
Conclusion
Pay particular attention today to how you are dependent on the world around you - the weather outside, the food you eat, the news you read, what you see and what you do, the people you encounter, the chance happenings that occur. In the same way, notice how the way you move through the world affects others. What do you see? What surprises you? What can you do to make the world a better place because you were in it?
Once we start noticing this interdependence, the relationships within systems, we see differently. The beauty and the flaws become more apparent. There’s a feeling of appreciation for what’s working and an awareness of what’s broken. You feel a part of something bigger and that brings with it a sense of responsibility.
I imagine a world where all beings and cultures and ecosystems are cared for and celebrated. I want to live as part of a society that respects and cares for all those considered ‘Other’ (including the natural world), and that appreciates differences across cultures. A world where the ways of all are centered and valued. How about you?
This is the final thematic essay for this Seeing Clearly project (at least for the time being). Next month, I plan to introduce a new project on following the threads of attention. Stay tuned.
Resources
Read this poetic piece by Donella Meadows, which made me question any boundaries between me and not-me.
Fabulous article Kim!